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Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The Love Dare Day #2

My challenge for yesterday's, Love Dare Day #1 was to practice patience and to say nothing negative. I am not a patient person nor do I hold my tongue wisely so as you can imagine yesterday was a challenge for me. Because I was mindful of my words, I was amazed on the amount of times, a negative thought came to mind. I can say the most hurtful things. I remembered a scene in the movie "Fireproof" when the husband character Caleb was telling his friend how he did not feel welcome in his own home and that his wife didn't show any respect. I can relate to that. Many times when Dusty walks through the door I am on instant attack mode.. How dare he come home from work. He doesn't have to say a word, I just attack for no apparent reason and then later pretend that everything is okay. The tension in our home can become so thick that everyone is on high stress alert, my kids and even the dog can feel it.

I realized yesterday that my negative words and lack of patience not only was towards Dusty but also my children. I have decided to extend this love dare to my children as well. They deserve a mom who will love them with kindness at all times. Holding my tongue with my teenager will be a challenge that I am sure most mothers of teenage girls can appreciate.

Yesterday morning was difficult during the morning rush to get to school and work. Usually I would yell at my kids to hurry up and when they did not come running down the stairs one second later, I would threaten them with the loss of a privilege. I hardly ever follow through with my threats and my daughters know that so the yelling never helps. The definition of a crazy person is to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results.... I am that crazy person. But yesterday, I did hold my tongue and to my amazement the world did not come to a complete stop. Everyone got to their destinations on time too!

Last night on his way home, Dusty called me from his cell to tell me that he was going to the club to workout. I was in the middle of making one of his favorite meals and my first thought was to get angry and to be honest I was irritated but I did not say a word. What a shock for me. I held my tongue from voicing the negative words that were trying to burst through my teeth. I told him to have a good workout and I'll see him when gets home. I could tell from his voice he was confused and probably wondering why I wasn't going off on one of my famous tangents. . So I delayed dinner and in reality it wasn't a big deal. Holding my tongue and letting it go wasn't so bad. Dusty came home, we ate dinner, and the evening was pretty pleasant.

Today's Love Dare is: In addition to saying nothing negative to your spouse again today, do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness. Until then....

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