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Facebook can be an excellent tool to keep in touch with family members... Catching up with friends - present and past... I personally enjoy looking at friends' pictures and silly random posts.. The random pictures make me laugh the most... It can be fun... It can be silly.. I am currently playing Scrabble with a few friends on FB - competing in Bejeweled - hoping to one day beat my friend Susan's awesome scores... Facebook is also an excellent way to get news out to your people... Whether the news is good or bad... Many people have FB updates sent to their phones...
Facebook also has a very ugly side... It can bring out the worst in people... It amazes me the comments and daggers people will post.... A post that can be so innocent in meaning can become a target to slander... A end to a friendship... A hurt feeling... or more....
I have learned my lesson the hard way to not respond or post things that I feel could be taken wrong.. For example... Almost 2 years ago - I was angry with a family member that is not on Facebook - I posted a random post that did not address the particular person by name- but if you knew what was going on at the time you would have known exactly who the dagger/post was about.... A family member that was aware of the conflict did see the post and was angered by my "attack".. It could have become really ugly - I was confronted.. and I did apologize for my immaturity and I was forgiven for my stupidity... One other time a friend of mine posted that he did not believe in the Rapture.. I see the Rapture as a fact.. he did not... We did not see eye to eye and our comments back and forth became disrespectful... He ended up de-friending me... We are good now.. But I have learned from this experience - If I disagree with a comment or belief - I don't comment.. I do not get involved.... If I have concern... I will call the person.. Or send a private note.. I will no longer debate on a Wall....
I recently was in a discussion with a friend about the comments people make on posts... It really is crazy that people who don't know you well (and some who do) - will attack you based on your status... And you wonder -What the heck just happened here? One comment I received recently had me scratching my head... I really wanted to comment back... I really did... But I slept on it.. I realized that I don't have to defend my thoughts.. My lifestyle.. So I chose to ignore it... And if the person posts another random ignorant dagger.. than I can de-friend that person...
Facebook should be fun... It should be free of daggers and anger... Face Book is for Friends..
Have you Encountered Any Daggers?
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I love this post! I have seen some pretty nasty things slathered across the walls of my friends. What amazes me, is often time it is family members doing the dagger posting and then all the family business ends up on face book for all to see. I have a facebook but do not post much because everytime to do some stupid family memeber makes and ignorant comment that makes me want to delete my account. Social networking is fun but I think it opens to many inappropriate doors.
ReplyDeleteI may share this on facebook to remind my friends to keep it nice.
Have a great day!
Crystal
http://kennedymomandwife.blogspot.com
I've lucked out in that those that are my friends on fb haven't done any of the stuff you talked about. Though once I did write on a friends wall that I thought she was wrong about 'Teen Mom' and made a point as to why with some back up from the internet.
ReplyDeleteShe wouldn't talk to me for weeks. I learned my lesson, no more contradictions on my part. I just ignore those statements that make me think that the person is wrong.
I haven't run into any problems myself, but some of my friends have. It can be easy to misread things when it's only in print and you can't see or hear the non-verbal cues.
ReplyDeleteI just ignore the things I'm not sure about, because having a disagreement on Facebook doesn't sound good to me!
Great post!
Yes, I know exactly what you mean! I haven't necessarily been involved first hand but I have seen this type of thing very often.. and many times on product/company pages, I just think its the wrong environment to pitch a full blown complaint there... there is a place and a time for this!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for this post and of course for joining us for Give It To Me Monday ;)
I saw it on MySpace a little more than Facebook, but I think it's because Facebook is a little more closed off. You can often see the veiled insults and comments when people go through a breakup or just have a fight. I've even seen people hint about their marital troubles on there...while they're still supposedly happily married. They come out of it okay and then you feel awkward around them, like you've witnessed something you weren't supposed to. It just seems like that isn't the place for it -- people need to address the problems with the person privately.
ReplyDeleteEven though I'm usually impulsive, I restrain myself, its supposed to be fun right?
ReplyDeleteFinally someone speaking up about how messy Facebook can be. I've began to do much less personal posting and more biz within FB. Great post... your honesty is so refreshing! New follower via Sunday Blog Hop. Hope to see you soon at http://shallowocityblogspot.com
ReplyDeleteCHEERS!
My BIL's ex made some nasty comments about my MIL. She wasn't friends with my MIL, but she was friends with me, so I let her know that my MIL would be able to see it.
ReplyDeleteShe unfriended me. I was totally fine with that.
Thanks for stopping by! Returned the follow love.
No real daggers. I have certainly engaged in a few discussions/debates, but very seldom has it turned disrespectful. I'm lucky to have many rational and intellegent facebook friends! I love the sharing of different ideas, I learn a lot that way!
ReplyDeleteI could not agree with you more! I had a so-called "friend" whose life revolved around Facebook...She not only threw daggers, she would go out of her way to try and stalk exes and create problems for people online. When I de-friended her because the drama got too thick when it came to her and I didn't want to be a part of it, she took it upon herself to harass me and my family. Some people really do use the internet to cause problems! I just keep my mouth shut, or address someone in person or on the phone. Things online can easily be blown out of proportion, and it's a little too public an arena. Anyway, thanks for stopping by! I am your newest follower!
ReplyDeleteBrandy
http://www.NewlyCrunchyMamaOf3.com
I have had a couple of bad incidents happen on fb and now those people are no longer apart of my life. Some are just so immature and think it's a geat way to bully others and belittle them. My page now has friends and family who love and support me and also fabulous bloggers who, even though we have never met, feel like family:-) You are right, it should be fun and silly not negative and stressful.
ReplyDeleteI am a new follower from the Monday blog hop and would love it if you could follow me back! I hope you are having a great Monday!
ReplyDeleteHope
http://www.peanutbutterandhopey.com
I haven't seen anything bad on facebook and really hope I don't!
ReplyDeleteI actually don't use facebook much. I have the blog on there but my personal facebook page usually just sits there with nothing happening. I'm glad your situations were worked out after the fact.
ReplyDelete