It is funny to me how my children can be so different from each other..... They are both raised in the same home.. the same parents... the same values... the same rules.... the same love - but they are as different as night and day...
One loves anything chocolate - the other is NOT a chocolate fan.
One loves to run and play and has a lot of energy - the other would rather watch TV
One loves to spend time with me.. all the time - the other rather be alone.
One is a joyful helper - the other rather be helped...
One has a great attitude - the other has a storm brewing overhead...
Today - I had to take a privilege away - a privilege that my troubled one claims to love.... But because of her horrible attitude and disrespect to her coach she can no longer play tennis... There has been months of warnings... months of second and third and fourth time chances to make it right.... Today - I had to discipline.... and I hate it...... Being a parent is tough - Not knowing if you are making the right decisions can be heart breaking.....
Today, I am praying for the knowledge and words to enter the heart of my negative one... I see she is lonely..... I see that her negative attitude has prevented her from having a lot of happiness and friends... She has so many wonderful gifts - she is smart... she is funny..... she has a giving and loving heart.... I wish she knew what a treasure she is......
I hope that she does figure it out and that things turn around for her. :)
ReplyDeleteYes - kids can be so different. My three all show me that. And discipline is so hard. It makes you realize that when your parents said "it will hurt me more than you", they were telling the truth!
ReplyDeleteYesterday, my mind drew that infamous blank too. A state of not knowing what the right thing to do actually is. There are so many factors to consider when dealing with negative behavior, huh? Here's hoping in the long run she comes to the conclusion that it's because we really do love her.
ReplyDeleteYou are doing the right thing. My husband's oldest daughter was allowed to get by with having a negative attitude and it still plagues her, well all of us. She is 26 yrs old and we are beginning to see a little change. Healthy boundaries and rules are very important. I will pray for you. It is tough being tough, but know you are doing what GOD would have you to do.
ReplyDeleteBlessings, andrea
I have two opposite sons and I THANK God for his tender mercy in this regards. I couldn't deal with two of Firstborn.
ReplyDeleteKelly,
ReplyDeleteI too, have two daughters that are day and night like yours. Time will change some of those differences and in the meantime, embrace the positive ones.
Love and Hugs ~ Kat
Wow, Kelly, I felt like you were talking straight from my house!! My daughter has that same negativity, doom and gloom, everything is a drama. If a shirt doesn't "feel" right, it's the end of the world. Just like you described...always a storm brewing. She can also be fun-loving and hysterically witty and joyous, but you have to catch her in that mood. This has kept friends at arms length, because they don't want her drama dripping all over them. She's a walking-talking-reaction-on-legs.
ReplyDeleteIt is heartbreaking. Because she's a fabulous, beautiful girl. She started high school this year and it's been a nightmare in some ways. I, too, have had to punish and take valued possessions and privileges away to see if it makes a difference. They don't understand just how gut-wrenching it is to have to be that person, when all you want to do is enjoy being with them.
I wish you the best and you have my prayers. Teenage girls can be alien beings and I only hope she comes out of it a well-adjusted adult!
Take care... Sharla
Both of my children are complete opposites. I know all about the teenage girl drama. I'll be keeping you in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteYour kids are adorable. Parenting is just tough. My kids are so similar, but so very different too...cannot wait to see what happens.
ReplyDeleteHolly