When I was a kid growing up my mom would often tell me that I was going to learn from her mistakes.... I had rules growing up -rules to protect me - rules to help me become responsible - rules to help me live in the real world... Of course, I thought my mom was over protective... completely irrational and extremely old fashion... So when puberty hit and I knew more than my mom ( every teen is smarter than their parents) - I looked for ways to work around her rules....
Now I have two girls... both are teens... both are "smarter" than me.. both think I am over protective... completely irrational and extremely old fashion.... Looking back on the things I did in my youth - I am lucky (seriously) that I wasn't hurt... or worse... It's funny how my daughters believe I have no idea what it is like to have my hormones take over my mind and body... They believe I have no idea what it feels like to be crazy about a boy or two or three.. When I was a teen - I could have written the book on "Boy Crazy" They don't believe that I "get" peer pressure... Oh my girls, I remember the pain and the joys of being a young teen... I remember wanting to grow up faster... I remember wanting my first kiss... my first boyfriend.. my first.....
Because of the things I did growing up - I am a stricter parent... (I did things that my parents never found about it.) I became the master of sneaking out of the house... Remember "party lines" that was the 1978 - 1981 version of the Internet to meet the opposite sex.. I got caught once and my phone was taken away for a couple of weeks.. The next time I wasn't caught and met a much older teen - I was 15 and he was 18... I climbed out my window and went to a Queen concert over 20 miles away.... other nights I was at "much older" crowd parties - hanging out at the beach .. I thought I was cool - I thought I was safe.... Now that I am a forty-four (44) year old mother of two daughters - the idea of my kids doing those things scares the crap out of me.... I was lucky.... In today's world - that kind of behavior may not be so lucky..... My youth may have made me become even more sensitive to what's out there thus being more protective... maybe..
So the other day - my oldest got caught doing something that she knows she shouldn't do.. She's been caught a few too many times lately - so she is being punished... She has lost all her privileges - Everything - her phone, TV, IPOD, computer, and has to go to bed early.... She can earn back her privileges but it will be only one privilege at at time.. All we ask is that she have a good attitude and use good judgment... Ten consecutive days of good behavior she can earn 1 privilege back.. I don't know if we are doing it right - I have to pray that I am making the right decisions.. that she will learn the consequences for good and bad behavior.. The world can be a scary place....
So my kids will continue to think that I am over protective, completely irrational, and extremely old fashion and that's okay..... I love them so very much and my goal is to give them the opportunity to have a life that is far better than mine... Just like my mom's dream was for me... So I really Have Become My Mother...
